"With the passing of 2004, we look back on a fun year of annoying the Florida-based staff of HLS-supplier Primate Products. Hopefully, with every visit of the mail carrier, every time they opened their e-mail Inbox, and with the occassional evening phone call, there was a reminder that we know who they are, where they live, and the animal suffering that they are responsible for.
In 2004, we filled-out tall stacks of magazine subscription cards and requested hundreds of mail-order catalogs each for Primate Product employees Donald Bradford, Eileen Sylvester, Donna Steiner and John Resuta. We also subscribed them to every book club and dating service we could find, and placed free ads in local papers (Don, still getting calls about that refrigerator you're selling for cheap?)
In 2004, we accessed Eileen Sylvester's frequent flier accounts. Fortunately, frequest flier miles can be used for more than just free flights. We donated her 8,000 US Airways miles to charity (Save the Children). With her Northwest and Delta miles (20,000 miles; that's almost enough for a free ticket!), we subscribed her to magazines. We hope she's enjoying her subscriptions to Sports Illustrated for Kids, PC Gamer, Great Lakes Angler, Diabetes Forecast, Cigar Aficionado, and others. Tip to Eileen: Don't use your birthday as a password!
As much fun as all that was, we have big (and less innocent) plans for 2005. See you soon, monkey killers!
Primate Products staff (e-mail, home address, home phone):
-Donald A. Bradford, President
-Eileen M. Sylvester,
-Donna A. Steiner, Head
-John P. Resuta, Operations